the only place i’ve been truly safe.
able to create…
a place to concentrate.
i must be magical to do what i did
able to turn off tune out go away
distort bend time change time
distort me and time
the place, the people
my tongue as big as the room
me, as tiny as an ant
i was so still there
so still barely even a breath
secret even to myself
whole lives go on around me
no one sees me it’s best this way
no angels. no family. no friends.
here, i am invisible.
to be invisible takes total & utter concentration
focus on one point- only
until you don’t know anything else
barely a breath
not one movement
don’t worry, nothing can distract me
in practicing, i create safety and knowing
then…at the flip of a switch
i’m there i’m gone.
i wasn’t just invisible, i was safe
enclosed from further anything
i was untouchable – while my body was
being touched & tortured & raped.
there was no dancing.
that was over
no silliness….just work at perfecting
my sanctuary. my inner matchbox.
inner matchbox exists in my calves
and the center of my head.
thoroughly abundant in my silence